what, you want eternal diapers?

[alenxa_classic]

I suppose this is one of those things one can't possibly understand until one has children of one's own, but what is the deal with not wanting them to grow up? Almost all the moms around here have been up in arms the last few weeks because their kids have advanced another grade and they're just heartbroken that their babies are growing up. And I'm thinking, Did you want to be changing diapers for the rest of your life? Do you want them never to be able to be responsible for anything much? Is it fun enough to clean up mud/spit-up/grape juice on the nice white sofa that you want to do it every weekend from now on? And did you expect that they'd just freeze at the point you liked best and never change again? Did you do that as a kid? If not, why should your kid be any different?

Well, there's the survival function, I guess. If women were completely satisfied with the length of time kids lingered at a stage, they might never voluntarily have another one. With a lot of people, that might not be a bad thing; and besides, I have a feeling that there are plenty of moms out there who have hit that equilibrium. You can probably tell them by the way they don't complain about how big their kids are getting......

Comments

[maldis.livejournal.com]

I wonder if it's a kind of hormonal addiction. Seriously. We crave sugar so much because it makes us feel really good. Maybe we produce certain neurochemicals when interacting with our young that also make us feel really good.

[sekl.livejournal.com]

And did you expect that they'd just freeze at the point you liked best and never change again?

As far as I can tell from non_seqvitvr's mom, the answer to your question is yes. Eternal 10 year olds, all obedience, no messes.

But for normal people it may be for the same reason that devoted urbanites wax nostalgic about the small towns they came from. They remember it as a simpler time. Kids get more complicated and more critical and some parents long for the days when a balloon could really fix all problems. They've completely forgotten about the couch stains, the forks in the light sockets, and the remote controls in the fish tank.

You can probably tell them by the way they don't complain about how big their kids are getting......
Some parents do better with teens. My Dad had that line from Last Crusade down pat, "You left just when you were getting interesting." He wanted more kids, he just wanted them to spring from his head, as fully-grown 15 year-olds.

[non-seqvitvr.livejournal.com]

Yep, the whole Zeus / Athena thing is pretty much the typical guy's idea of the perfect child-rearing experience. There she is, wise and (presumably) educated, has a respectable profession lined up, and you don't have to worry about her getting into trouble with boys as a teenager (especially when you remember how you (Zeus) thought of teenage girls when you were a teenager). Armor. Yep. That's the ticket.

Overall though, the whole "never want them to grow up" phenomenon depends a lot on what you're in a mood to remember. Keeping a baby cleaned up really isn't all that bad, except when they're at the "helpful" age and try to change themselves... Sometimes you just concentrate on the good things rather than the bad.

Like my mom. I'm not sure the children she remembers... maybe age 10 seemed easy after my brother and I hit teenage years.